I stood there frozen. What the fuck just happened?
I stood there with the shower still running, and I was alone. Kayden had just walked out after I had confessed my feelings towards him. He was angry.
What I did not understand was why he was mad. He had said it first and I had simply said it back. Not that I didn’t mean it, I meant it. But he had no right to get angry. He had said it first. What was he expecting me to do.
I wrapped a towel around my body and walked out of the shower turning the shower off. The fact that I was naked beneath the damn towel did not seem so important anymore.
“What the fuck was that?” I asked Kayden the minute I walked back into the room.
He looked at me with a hard glare. His eyes were cold and held zero emotion. The intensity I had seen in them a few minutes ago was long gone.
“Kayden, talk to me!” I shouted at him once more.
He continued to ignore me and I swear I was losing my mind trying to figure out what I had done wrong.
I walked towards him timidly. He was standing in front of the bed, his hands on his waist, his eyes on me.
“Kayden, please” I said and my hand reached out to touch him, but he flinched and stopped it from making contact with his skin.
“Do you have a death wish!” He bellowed suddenly.
I looked at him, confused.
“What do you mean?”
“How can you say you love me. What in God’s name is wrong with you?”
Okay if I thought I was confused before then clearly I had overstated the confusion. Now I was seriously confused.
“What the fuck do you mean ‘what is wrong with me’? Need I remind you that you said it first?” I asked him.
He was silent.
“Me saying it doesn’t give you a right to say it back. You’re my fucking pet, I can do what I want and say what I want to you.” He growled.
His words sliced my heart life a hot knife cutting through knife. Where had my Kayden gone to all of a sudden. I stood there, frozen, looking at the man I had just told I loved. The man who loved me too, or at least he claimed to.
Tears rolled down my cheeks as I stared into his stone cold eyes. Those same eyes which had held so much warmth.
“Just tell me one thing, did you mean it?” I asked.
His eyes softened just slightly, then they went back to their cold, hard stare.
“It was a heat of the moment thing” he stated, “I didn’t mean it”
My heart shattered. I felt like dying. No, I felt dead.
I looked at him, my body shaking.
“I will be in my room if you need me, Master” I whispered.
I began to walk away from his room, not minding the fact that I was in only a towel.
“Lia..” he called but I didn’t stop. I kept walking towards the door in silence. Then I stopped just before opening the door.
“When they told me you were a monster, I thought that you enjoyed hurting people, I thought you only enjoyed inflicting physical pain. I didn’t know you also get off of playing with people’s emotions, and killing them on the inside. But now I know.” I paused deliberating whether I should say my next sentence.
“And yet me being human and weak, I still love you, even though you are a monster.” I sniffed and walked out of the room.
I rushed to my room, feeling like I was gonna break into two.
I entered my room and closed my door, I sobbed as I slid down the door, a sob threatening to escape my lips.
I pulled myself up from the floor. And threw myself on the bed. A sobbed and sobbed. Allowing my sadness to engulf me. I don’t know how long I lay there.
“Talia” I registered Emily’s voice.
I did not respond. I simply continued sobbing.
“Oh my God. Did he tell you already?” She asked rushing over to me.
I couldn’t reply, I just kept on sobbing, letting all my frustrations and pains out.
“Argh. I told him not to tell you yet. It’s a lot to handle, finding out that your parents are dead can’t be easy. Especially when your life with Kayden was ….” she stopped mid sentence as she realised that my sobbing had stopped.
“Talia…?” She asked.
My world had just been shattered.
“My.. my. .. my parents. .” I couldn’t say it.
The only reason I had been strong so far was because I had the hope of seeing them again. But now, my only reason for living no longer existed.
“Talia.. ohh my God. You didn’t know yet did you?” I faintly registered Emily’s voice.
“They are gone” I whispered to myself.
I felt dizzy all of a sudden.
And I felt myself drifting off silently and slowly.
“Talia, wake up.” I heard a voice whispering.
I groaned as I opened my eyes.
When I saw Kayden’s face looming over mine, my heart went cold.
“Are you here to rub salt into my wounds?” I asked sitting up straight and leaning back against the headboard.
“No Kayden, if you’re here to pretend to be sorry then save your breath. You and I both know you do not give two shits about me. So if you’re not here to drink from me or to bury that thing between your legs in me then leave, please” I said.
Kayden’s jaw clenched, and I could see he was trying his best to keep his temper in check.
“I will be going away for 2 weeks. I hope you get better while I’m away. And I hope that when I come back we can talk about things.” He said.
“Typical, when the going gets tough, Kayden ‘goes away'” I said.
“Just go!” I yelled.
He flinched at my sudden outburst.
“I’m sorry.” He said standing up straight.
I rolled my eyes at him and rolled over so that he was facing my back.
“I love you Lia. I swear on my life I do, and when I come back I’m gonna make it up to you. I promise”
I heard his words with my ears, but my heart did not receive them. I was not going to do this again. I was not going to let him use me physically and emotionally as well.
“Your words have lost their meaning Kayden” I answered.
The room fell silent, but I could still feel his presence in my room.
“I love you” I finally heard him say before the door closed shut.
“And sadly, I love you too” I whispered to myself a few minutes after he had left.
I let the grief consume me.
I had officially lost everything! ????????????